2013-2014: K5/1st "Look what a lot of things there are to learn..."

"You may grow old and trembling in your anatomies, you may lie awake at night listening to the disorder of your veins, you may miss your only love, you may see the world about you devastated by evil lunatics, or know your honour trampled in the sewers of baser minds. There is only one thing for it then — to learn. Learn why the world wags and what wags it. That is the only thing which the mind can never exhaust, never alienate, never be tortured by, never fear or distrust, and never dream of regretting. Learning is the only thing for you. Look what a lot of things there are to learn..."

T.H. White, The Once and Future King

So we really would fall into the "eclectic unschooler" category of homeschoolers going by how things have happened this past year for Pre-K/K4.  If you remember our great plans, I will tell you now we did not complete even half of them.  Some of this was due to SC racing past where the curriculum was in math, necessitating a change mid-year, and some of this was because some of the choices were just too much for her at four.  Also, I did not strictly enforce the routine I had set up at the beginning of the year and allowed lazy mornings that moved into chores, playtime and errands, and then forgotten lessons for weeks at a time.  We also did quite a bit of traveling, which I feel is hugely important at SC's age, but I think I could have handled it better rather than completely eschewing school.  On the bright side, SC hasn't suffered from a very relaxed Pre-K/K4 year and testing has shown she is still years ahead in both math and reading.  In fact, she seems to just absorb information as she goes along.

This year, though I love the lazy time we get to spend together, we have to step up the routine a little.  I honestly think SC would manage some of her meltdowns (one day I will post about these) a bit better if we had a more routine schedule, and I am really excited about doing kindergarten with her this year (though much of what we will be doing is solidly 1st grade).  She is very excited, too, and keeps eyeing the box (see picture above) I have keept everything corralled in as I work on the plans.  By the way, in case you think I am nuts, not everything in that box will be completed this year, but in some cases is was cheaper overall to buy a "package" than just what we might complete this year.

Also, SC will be continuing to attend the preschool she was at as they have added a twice-per-week "bridge" kindergarten class.  Though academically she will be past most of what they are learning, the experiences (like "book character day" and other themed days) cannot be replicated well in a one-child home (in my opinion), and there are some things that she will learn (like the Pledge of Allegiance) that I probably wouldn't think to teach if going at it solely on my own.  In the future I may have to get one of those books that lists out things like this.  So, that means, our homeschooling schedule for the fall currently looks like this:

M: 8am - 12pm
T: 8am-9am
W: 8am - 1pm (including lunch break)
R: 8am-8am
F: 8am - 12pm
Sa: 9am - 11am

I could probably cram everything into M/W/F but I wanted to leave time for us to go on field trips and have park days, so AC and I agreed Saturday morning would be an okay time to get some schooling in.  I have also purposely scheduled science for Saturday morning so AC can do it with us.  I have also added one language arts activity on T/R mornings before our out-of-the-home kindergarten class.

Finally, without further ado, here are our plans for K5/1st:

BIBLE

After a friend posted a link to Telling God's Story, I knew I had found the perfect study for our family.  From Olive Branch Books' website, the program is described as one that "treats the Bible as a unified, exciting, true story with Jesus as the most important character."  YES!  This is my problem with story-based or thematic studies, because I feel they minimize Jesus and what Jesus did.  They are important to the Bible, but only when the Bible is taken as a whole, with the climax of the story being Jesus.  If you are at all interested in this, author Peter Enns writes a Parents' Guide that is a quick, easy read that describes the program and how he will follow the classical education model in developing this twelve-year study.  The first year of the study, which is what we will be doing, is focused on "Meeting Jesus," and what a wonderful place to start when telling God's story.

LANGUAGE ARTS

Since this is a "real" school year (though still not actually required by the state of Texas), I wanted to find something more than just a mix of random handwriting and phonics programs with a few read-alouds thrown in.  Though math seems to really be SC's thing, mine is reading and literature.  I am really excited that I heard about the Junior Great Books  "Read-Aloud" curriculum.  Even thought it is typically used in a group setting (which may pose a problem if we stick with it in later years), I think it will be a good, easy introduction for SC into some great literature (short stories and poetry), as well as the process of discussing what is read.  We will spread out the lessons so that each story takes two weeks, and do the "Sailing Ship Series" during the fall and the "Dragon Series" next spring, and then move along to the other two "Read-Aloud" series next year.

To go along with this I have also found a program from the Center for Gifted Education called Jacob's Ladder, which (at this level) takes picture book stories and helps guide kids through "ladders" of reading comprehension.  I am sort-of doubling up between this and the Junior Great Books when it comes to reading, but each program has its own areas of strength, and the reading choices in Jacob's Ladder are such that as SC develops her reading skills she may be able to read the selections on her own and then work through the comprehension.

Finally, though SC has tested at the level of someone 6.8 years in reading, she still struggles when it comes to sounding out new words and will typically just shrug her shoulders in hopes that I or AC will just tell her the word, which she then commits to memory.  This year, in an attempt to give her the tools to boost her reading confidence, we are going to be trying All About Reading Level 1.  I am actually pretty excited about this program too, as I have heard great things about it.

We will supplement when we feel like it with Explode the Code because SC likes it, but it won't be something I schedule into our regular schedule.

To go along with All About Reading we will also be using All About Spelling Level 1, though I am still unsure how to schedule these together.  I have read that some people start AAR and then later start AAS, but others seem to do them simultaneously.

We are still working slowly on A Reason for Handwriting level A, though that is due more to the fact that it is something to be done five days per week and we have only been schooling three days (when we stick to a schedule at all) rather than SC not wanting to or lacking the fine motor skills.  In fact, she writes daily when she makes "cards" for AC and I, or doing other schoolwork.  We will continue level A this fall (and hope we can get it done daily) and then move on to level B when we get there.

Another thing we will add in is some time working on writing, and specifically creating a narrative.  I saw WriteShop Primary at the Homeschool Book Fair, but there was just so much extra stuff that wasn't really writing that I decided against it.  So, I am sort-of modifying the Draw-Write-Now program to take the pictures, allowing SC to draw them as part of her "publication" (as well as practice following precise instructions), but then using that picture to create a story.  We will start by just copying the "handwriting" portion, and then build on that, brainstorming characters, plot, and making sure there is a beginning, middle and end.  We did the first lesson this summer as a trial and SC kept asking to get back to "Happy Mrs. Chicken."

Finally, as SC has been manipulating words and loves that they have classifications, I have decided to add in some light grammar once a week.  We will be reading Grammar-Land, the first third of Primary Language Lessons, and using the Critical Thinking Company's Language Smarts level B as a supplement.  I don't expect 100% mastery in this area, but I think she will enjoy it.



For our current list of prospective read-aloud books, check out this late summer post.

HISTORY

We started using the History Odyssey "Ancients" Level 1 last fall and I absolutely loved it.  However, it was just too much work for SC, and I really wasn't prepared to do all the activities  (and how much time it was taking) last year.  This year, I have planned three forty-minute sessions during the week, which should be ample time to complete everything.  We will probably start back at the beginning, as we only made it to week three last fall before shelving it.



MATH

We started Singapore Primary Mathematics level 1A at the end of last spring when we realized Math-U-See was not a good fit, and my hope over the summer was that we would be ready to start 1B for this fall.  However, we have been having a fun summer, and though we have done some math, we are not ready for 1B yet.  So, we will finish 1A first and then start on 1B.  However, I must say that this program is working very well with us and where SC refused to use the manipulatives to do the work for Math-U-See, she loves the other ways that are taught in Singapore (like using a number line).  We have also purchased some magnetic foam counters to use on the whiteboard and she has to come up and move them around to "show" me what she has been learning.  They have been a wonderful purchase!

We will be doing more of the Challenging Word Problems book, which we have not really touched, along with Process Skills in Problem Solving level 1.  We will also be starting up Life of Fred Apples, reading one lesson per week for "fun."

We will continue to work on Lollipop Logic books, plus Connections: Activities for Deductive Thinking once per week.

SCIENCE

Last year I bought Apologia's Exploring Creation with Astronomy to try, and it was just too demanding for SC, even using the Junior Notebooking Journal.  We shelved it before we even finished the first week (when it asked for her to create a mnemonic phrase to memorize the order of the planets).  I still think it will be a bit much for her this year, but I discovered a set of "change" themed units by the Center for Gifted Education that are K-1 level and look perfect.  There are three units of twelve lessons each, which will be perfect for our year.  First we will do Survive and Thrive, which covers life science; then we will do Water Works, which covers physical science; finally we will finish up with How the Sun Makes Our Day, the Earth science unit.  Hopefully this will be a good transition into the Apologia Astronomy next year.  Also, we did get a membership to the Perot Museum, and have many field trips planned for this year already, as well as to the nearby zoo.

SPANISH

I hope you aren't reading this and wondering what happened to our learning French last year.  Needless to say, I definitely over-scheduled what would work for a four-year-old.  We have decided to switch to Spanish, however, instead of just trying again with the French sitting on the shelf, because SC has really noticed that there are quite a few people in Texas who speak Spanish and wants to learn it.  At the Homeschool Book Fair I came across the SongSchool Spanish program and it looked like a fun introduction to the language.  Coupled with Muzzy DVDs from the library, some books of coloring pages and other printables, flashcards, Oh, Noah! and Salsa on the computer, hopefully we will be set for success.

MUSIC / PHYSICAL EDUCATION / ART

SC started piano lessons last fall, but struggled with "waiting for the other kids to catch up" because she picked up what the instructor was teaching so quickly.  We tried moving to private lessons, but it was with a new instructor who just could not handle SC and her mobility.  After waiting all through the spring semester for the original instructor to still not have space, she recommended another teacher and this one is very good with SC.  We went for a few trial lessons over the summer and are now waiting expectantly for lessons to start back up at the end of August.

For physical education, SC will be attending gymnastics, swimming lessons (her favorite), and dance class twice per week.  I am also trying to institute a "walk-the-dog" ritual in the morning (more for my physical education than hers), but it won't happen until it is no longer over 100 degrees!

While we will not be doing formal "art" instruction this year, our Bible program includes many art history studies/projects, as does the History Odyssey program.  She will be creating art with the Draw.Write.Now books to accompany her writing, as well as at other random times throughout our weeks for her own personal reason (she likes to make cards for people).  Also, I have a number of Dover coloring books that cover the history of art and some of the "great" artists, and we will utilize these in conjunction with various other subjects and read-alouds.

I realize this seems like quite a bit, but it really does fit into the schedule outlined above (I will do a more thorough post in a couple of weeks as to what our days will actually look like).  The only thing I haven't included here are the audiobooks (read-alouds) that we will be doing thrice a week, but I have written a separate post about that.  We are also going to finish off our week on Saturday mornings by having a traditional British elevenses and listening to some classical music.

What does your new school year look like?  Have you used any of these programs, and did you love them/hate them?  Leave a comment and let me know!

I am also linking up with the 5th Annual "Not Back-to-School" Blog Hop from iHomeschool Network.

"Most people would walk along a path beside the river."

"Imagine you have to go along an Alpine river valley,” she said. “Most people would walk along a path beside the river. Not Leo. He’ll run up the first mountain and give you the view from there – and maybe across into the next valley, too. Then he’ll run down and up a mountain on the opposite side.  In no time, he’ll be exhausted – maybe he won’t reach the end.
But his journey will have been a damn sight more interesting than yours.
And he’ll know a lot more about that valley."
-Martin Buckley, 2013

A couple of days ago I read an article by a father named Martin Buckley called 
"My child is a genius – and it isn’t always easy."  I felt like I was reading an article I could have written about SC.  The resemblance to both Leo, and the parenting styles of Buckley, were uncanny to SC and I.  It has motivated me to write the post, which I have been holding back from, because maybe there is someone who will read it and feel comforted that they aren't alone, in the same way I was comforted by knowing Buckley and Leo exist.

First of all, I should point out that I personally don't like any of the terms that are used to describe gifted children because they are all alienating.  No matter which term you use, as a parent, as soon as you say "my child is gifted," you are also telling the world "my child is different," and no parent wants to have a child who might face challenges because of this.

Well, my child is gifted.  

For those who want the hard facts, we recently had SC tested (as we are starting kindergarten and wanted to know just where she was at so we can make the best educational decisions for her going forward) using the WPPSI-III and the WIAT-II.  The results came with a note from the examiner that SC's "inability to attend" made the results much lower than they should be, as did the fact that she refused to answer the "easy" questions (but did answer the more difficult ones).  This showed mostly on the WPPSI-III.  Without going into too much detail, on the WIAT-II, SC scored in the 99.8th percentile for Word Reading, and the 99.7th percentile for Math Reasoning.  Her age equivalents for these subtests are 6.8 years and 7 years, respectively.  She just turned 5.

In the article, Buckley wrote

"By the time Leo was four, it was sometimes hard to tell if he was wildly creative, or merely wild – unbounded, or lacking boundaries. "

Again, I felt like he was writing about us.  Having just lived through SC's fourth year, I would describe our frustration in this exact way.  Is she wildly creative, seeing the world through a different lens, or is she just wild?  Is she always questioning and asking why because her brain needs to understand, or is she just obstinate and defiant?  Buckley expounds that their experiences with Leo went similarly to our own daily experiences with SC. 

"Having it explained to him that he needed to sit in a given place, eat a given meal, follow a given routine, he would invariably ask, “Why?” And, often, he’d refuse. ...I learnt that a way to gain his cooperation was to weave a narrative around an action that made him want to become involved. And then his focus, his intensity of commitment, were remarkable and rewarding. But still exhausting."

AC laughs at my overly-detailed explanations of why SC should or should not do something, and how I give her very specific, truthful explanations to every question, but it is my only weapon against her mind deciding whether she should or should not.  She takes it all in, mulls it around, and then decides on her own.  One prominent example of this would be when SC was almost 4 years old, and we were struggling to get her to instinctively hold our hands when we crossed streets, the parking lot, etc.  She would just refuse, or pull away when we were walking.  She had decided she was big enough to walk on her own.  No matter how many times we explained how dangerous it could be, it wasn't until she saw on the local news a story about a young girl getting hit by a car in a parking lot that she decided to start holding hands, with no further pleading on my part needed.  She was able to see exactly what could happen if she went on her own, mulled it around in her head, and still actively grabs my hand now when we are walking near cars.  It isn't that she is afraid, either.  She has almost no fear of anything.  She just decided that being safe was a good choice for her in this situation.

Though AC goes along with my parenting style for SC, there have been times where outsiders (both extended family, as well as friends) have questioned us and the way we are doing things.  We have been told that we allow SC too much freedom, and it has been implied we are too lax in our discipline, regardless of the fact that every "suggestion" intended to guide her back toward compliance had been tried already and failed to bring about the result desired by these naysayers.  Buckley comments on the judgements of others, saying

"It was easy to feel isolated, because many parents and teachers judged that Leo had little parental formation, was allowed carte blanche.  The opposite was true. We worked daily, nightly, to impose routines. But Leo was reluctant to go along with anything just because he was asked to."

We do feel isolated most of the time; I, especially, since AC travels so much for work.  It is hard to find friends for me who understand I am doing the best I can with this bundle of energy and excitement God gave me, and it is hard to find friends for SC who are on her level intellectually.  She doesn't understand why her age-peers do many of the things they do, and when she tries to mimic them (to fit in), she overdoes it.  We have yet to find her intellectual peers, though she does well playing with the boys in the neighborhood who are a year or so older than she is.  However, we really don't get to see them that often.  Choosing to homeschool has isolated us even more, but at the moment that is the best choice for SC and where she is now.  She needs to be taught on the level she is at academically, and constantly stimulated intellectually, and in a public kindergarten, she probably won't get enough of that.  She is also in constant motion, and while at home she can do math in motion on the whiteboard, or lay on the floor to do reading, that is another thing that, if allowed in public kindergarten (and many or most students start acting this way), would cause utter chaos for the teacher in the classroom.

Many of the behaviors that SC exhibits that make her difficult to parent can be explained by a series of "overexcitabilities" that are common among gifted children.  A Polish psychiatrist named Kasimierz Dabrowski, who has specifically studied the intensity, excessive personalities and sensitivities of gifted children and adults, has grouped them together in his work, classifying them for the purpose of understanding.  If you want a good list of resources about Dabrowski's overexcitabilities, check out this page on the Hoagies' Gifted website.  However, I will list the classifications in brief, as summarized from the book Misdiagnosis and Dual Diagnoses of Gifted Children and Adults [MDDGCA], and how they relate to SC here.  

• The first overexcitability is "intellectual," which encompasses the excessive curiosity, question asking, theoretical thinking and problem solving.  This is a desire to simply gain knowledge, and the search of truth and understanding.  In SC, this is most obvious in her constant "why."  She doesn't only question when she is given instructions, she questions everything.
• The second overexcitability is "imaginational," which describes the complex imaginations, including pretend friends and their pretend worlds, but also the flair for the dramatic, daydreaming, and other visual creativities.  SC is less imaginative (though is very artistically creative), but she does have a fair amount of drama when she feels she needs to.
• The third overexcitability is "emotional," which is where extreme emotions and feelings are grouped.  Children and adults with this overexcitability tend to over-sympathize with the problems of the world around them, and become very attached to people, places and things.  They are frequently accused of overreacting, and in children, they may continue to have tantrums past the age of three and get excessively angry over minor issues.  This is an overexcitability I understand, as it is one that I have as well, but that doesn't make it easier when SC starts stomping her feet or throwing her body around.  She even hit the wall the other day when sent to timeout.  However, she also is hugely compassionate, and even someone who seems upset will send her into a fit of sympathetic tears.
• The fourth overexcitability is "psychomotor," which can be described as those who "love movement for its own sake, and they show a surplus of energy" (Webb, pg. 14).  This classification has SC written all over it, because one thing she doesn't do is stop moving.  Even in the car, strapped in, she is tapping her feet or doing something with her hands.  While some people who have this overexcitability may demonstrate it with a constant stream of chatter, SC simply is always in motion.  No matter how many physical activities we do in a day, she never tires out and is always ready for more.  Even when she was very small, she was on the go.
• The fifth overexcitability is "sensual," which details the aspects of life that a body's senses handle (sight, smell, touch, hearing, taste) and these are children and adults are overly sensitive to many of them.  For example, things like tags in clothing or lines on socks, an aversion to food textures, a dislike of noise in the background, or even strong smells literally overwhelm them.  This is one area that SC does not seem to have the noticeable overexcitability, but I tend to think it might be the opposite.  She can become excessive in her touch with people.  With other children, hugging turns into tackling, playing tag into shoving, and someone usually ends up hurt or upset.  With AC and I, we quickly become the jungle gym to be climbed upon when seated, and even if we are just standing together in line she might smack my body or or bump me roughly. 

Eventually we may have further testing done with SC, as was recommended by the examiner, that may help us narrow down these overexcitabilities and help us figure out if there are any underlying learning differences.  However, we will probably wait a few years to see what she simply "matures" out of and what doesn't, as well as any learning problems we stumble upon while schooling.

The most important thing out of all this is that I don't want to change SC and the person God created her to be.  She is intensely inquisitive.  She likes to have fun, and loves really good music, animals and showing those she loves that she loves them.  She gets upset when others are upset, and tells jokes that make sense to no one else, and laughs hysterically.  She picks up on things she shouldn't understand, and makes the most adult comments about them, like the time she told me how to get rid of lice (which she heard about on NPR).  She likes to quote movies and books, and sometimes at the wrong times, but always with relevance.  I don't want to produce another sheep for the factory floor, conforming to the current demands of demands of our American society.  I know God means for her to be more than just a follower of men.  He gave her this mind and spirit for His reasons, and who am I to break that for the whims of social acceptance?  I do want her to understand that there are rules that she has to follow, and that there will be consequences in she breaks them.  However, many of the rules imposed in the early years of childhood are done so for the purpose of learning a "lesson" that can be applied later in life.  There are minimal natural consequences for leaving your toys on the floor, and if the consequence is those toys going in the trash/donation and the child is okay with that, who comes out ahead as the winner?  What lesson has then been imparted that can be applied to later?  So, I trust that in time, as things come up that must be adhered to, God will show SC the "why," either through me or another outlet.  For now, I am okay that SC asks "why" after every instruction, because for her, she needs to really know, to understand (just like in the example with holding hands).  And, even if it is difficult and exhausting raising a gifted child, I trust God that He will give me what I need to support SC in becoming the best version of her that she can be.  As James Webb puts it (pg. 81), "as parents, our task is to discover who our child is and to help the child find his own profession."  That should be the goal of every parent.

In the future, I am going to try to be a bit more vocal about SC's giftedness when I write, because I think it is important for others in the same situation to know they are not alone.  Also, if you have a gifted child and are struggling (or not), I would love to hear from you (either through the comments or privately contact me through email at proverbs2pursuit@gmail.com) because it is hard to be on an island.

Cited:
Webb, James T., et. al. (2005). Misdiagnosis and Dual Diagnoses of Gifted Children and Adults. Scottsdale, AZ: Great Potential Press, Inc.

"As parents, our task is ..."

"As parents, our task is to discover who our child is 

and help the child find his own profession."

pg. 81, Misdiagnosis and Dual Diagnosis of Gifted Children and Adults, 

James T. Webb, et al

Admitting your child might be different, be it learning disabled or gifted, is difficult.  With programs like "No Child Left Behind," however, it has become much more acceptable to have a learning disabled child, and those who are intellectually or creatively gifted are seen as "weird" or "freaks."  Oftentimes parents are blamed for making their children the way they are by allowing them access to knowledge and learning at a young age.  A parent can no more make their child gifted by beginning to teach them at an early age than another parent can make their child disabled by not teaching them young.  In fact, it may be hard to believe, but most parents do not wish any differences upon their children at all, because our society sees differences of any kind (other than talent in sports) as a disadvantage.  There may be pressure, on both the child and the parents, to make the child conform to what society sees as "normal," be it through discipline, therapy or medication.  Webb, et al. states that "the attempt to give gifted children a 'normal' life and a 'normal' upbringing is like trying to make a giraffe act more like a horse -- an experience that is painful for all involved" (pg. 64).  Yet it is these differences, an integral part of who your child is, that may make up some of the more unique aspects of his or her personality.  If your child is not different in the same way that mine is, no offense is meant if/when I make generalizations or comments about groups of children.  If you have a child who is different from "normal," however he or she may be different, know that there are others out there who understand.  I hope my speaking out about the struggles we have parenting SC gives you confidence to do the same.

After one horrific piano lesson in early December 2012, I called SC's pediatrician in tears and made an appointment for an "11:30 consultation."  SC had just spent the entire lesson rolling around on the floor under the piano, jumping unrhythmically on purpose off the beats, answering questions about letters incorrectly (also on purpose), and just generally refusing to follow any of the teacher's instructions.  It may seem that she was just acting like a typical four-year-old, but the problem was she was capable of playing the piece the teacher had asked her to play.  In fact, when she finally played it (for the first time ever, after seeing the teacher play it only once, at the end of the lesson), she played it perfectly, with no mistakes.  

See, we had just moved her to private lessons, at the request of her former teacher, due to her impatience at waiting for the other children in her group lesson to catch up.  She caught on to everything her teacher had been doing so quickly, she was bored while the other kids tried to learn, and her previous teacher thought it might be a good idea if the entire lesson was focused on her.  In fact, this was a pattern that was becoming all too apparent, with piano lessons being the latest request to move SC from group lessons to private, because she understood things very quickly, and then would become bored (and inattentive, disobedient, destructive, out-of-control) while she waited for the other kids to "catch up" to where she was.

So, we made this appointment with her pediatrician, and he asked a series of questions.  We tried to give our observations, but it is hard to fit four and a half years of life with SC into a thirty minute consultation.  He said she sounded bright, but he also said he thought she had ADHD.  He then gave us  a checklist to fill out and one for each of her teachers, as well as a pamphlet about ADHD, and he said that the AAP recommends both occupational therapy/intervention plans as well as medication, and that doing both showed the best results with many patients.  

After making a follow-up for one month hence, we left the appointment dumbstruck.  ADHD was something that we had heard about, but we were not expecting him to say was SC's problem.  In fact, what we were hoping was that he would say she is not that different from all other kids her age, and maybe she is just more easily bored than others, and here is the solution to this problem.  In fact, I know I was looking for a magic answer.  A book of twelve steps to follow or a list of if...then statements that we matched up to her behaviors that made her more manageable   Instead, we left with the idea that our child might need to be medicated for the rest of her life in order to "fit in" to the acceptable social norms.  Now, I am not against all medication, and I believe that there are truly children that need to be on medication for their differences, but I also believe that parents should not swap one set of problems (the ADHD-like symptoms) for another set of problems (the side effects) that just so happen to be socially acceptable just because things are hard.  So, I did what I always do when I am faced with a problem - I started reading.

In August, I listed some books that I wanted to read as we attempt to decide which path would be the best educational path for SC, some of them about gifted children because it had been mentioned to us that SC seems to do things developmentally quicker than other children.  I thought it would be a good idea to include them, to see if they had any hints that might make our decision easier.  While  I have read some of these books in part, life tends to get in the way of our plans, and I have yet to completely finish any but the first two on the list, which are really long essays rather than books.  

However, as I attempted these past weeks to get back on track to learning about SC, I found a book called Misdiagnosis and Dual Diagnoses of Gifted Children and Adults by the author of of one of the gifted books already on my list.  This caught my eye because I had just spent over an hour with SC's preschool teacher, discussing her behavior in class, and that her teacher feels she does not have ADHD (she has been trained to recognize it, as well as gifted students through her teaching degree program and years in the public school system) but that she is even more highly advanced/gifted than we all initially thought.  She said that she believes the behavior problems are a combination of boredom and SC's emotional development still being at four years old, right where her peers are.

The authors of Misdiagnosis suggest that "as many as half of gifted children with the diagnosis of ADD/ADHD do not have the significant impairments due to attention or hyperactivity that are required ... to make an ADD/ADHD diagnosis" (pg. 37).  The problem is that many of the characteristics of children with ADHD actually can also be seen in gifted children, but the difference in the symptoms is only evident when someone asks the question "why" - why are they behaving the way they are.  For example, both a child with ADHD and a gifted child may not follow directions well, but a child with ADHD actually has trouble following them (and all rules/directions), while a gifted child is choosing not to follow certain ones after questioning their legitimacy.  Both children with ADHD and gifted children may seem unable to concentrate on tasks, but a child with ADHD has trouble focusing on all tasks that do not have immediate consequences, while a gifted child chooses not to focus on tasks they deem irrelevant or uninteresting.  It is very important to ask why a child is doing (or not doing) they thing that is causing the problem.  With SC, we already knew that the why of the behaviors was a convoluted explanation and a conscious choice on her part.  However, Misdiagnosis (and the resources I found at SENG) has opened up the possibility that this is because she is gifted rather than something needs to be "fixed."  Apparently, this is normal (for her).  

One of the solutions that the book offers to behavior problems is that "changing the environment can effectively treat many conditions" (pg. xxxiii).  The theory is that "many of these disorders [as diagnosed in gifted children] are the result of the interaction between temperament and environment" (pg. xxxiii), which is very much what SC's preschool teacher suggested.  In the preschool classroom, she has started pulling SC out for higher level work, like beginning addition, more advanced reading/phonics work.  She suggested that when we are working on homeschooling, that instead of seeing SC's desire to turn her handwriting letters into aliens or bugs as not following directions, to view them as her being creative because she is bored.  So, we cut down the handwriting to a more manageable "if you do this one line well, you can skip the next two," and it has really worked.  I get a focused, well written line of letters and she moves through it without feeling overwhelmed and bored.  We got a timer that we set for twenty minutes (that she loves to set and look at) before we start each new activity, and that has motivated her to work quickly.  If she isn't done by that time, we move on to something else and either come back to the first activity or, if her work so far was exceptional and it was clear she was bored, we don't.  We replaced her chair with an exercise ball that has kept her from bouncing all over the place (pun intended) as she tried to work on activities that require writing, be it phonics, math or handwriting.  

We have also headed in a more "unschooling" direction that is SC focused and led by her interests because, at the moment, we can do that.  She is still only four and a half years old, and she deserves play time.  I completely cut out science and French (other than videos or iPad games) and we will just wait until next year, and I am okay with that.  We took a trip to see mummies even though it cut out half of a week.  Some days we only do math, and some days we do everything.  Some days she wants to do art four times and that is okay, because then when we do get to things like phonics or handwriting, she is more interested in it and it does not feel like I am forcing her into it.

Misdiagnosis has opened up my eyes to the idea that SC is in the profoundly gifted category of children, and while that is nice to hear, it is also quite scary.  I like to joke that she is smarter than both AC and I, but it looks like it is true.  So the question becomes, what now?  Well, we went back to our pediatrician, armed with copies of resources, documentation from her preschool teacher, and ready to hear the worst - that we were "wishing" our child was gifted, but that he still felt we should try to put her on medication "just to see."  In reality, he diligently listened to our information, agreed that it is possible she fits into the profoundly gifted category of students, though she may have ADHD too.  However, his response this time was that "time will tell," and I am okay with that.  Through this brief, yet intense process, I have learned that time is the only thing that will give me an answer.  We will have to see if SC's emotional maturity levels out, or if she continues to struggle.  We talked about having her IQ tested, but he said at this point, it would just be for our own, personal reference, and to wait to spend the money if we need it for a school in the future.  Right now, we are comfortable with our decision for next year, to continue with the Mothers' Day Out's kindergarten program two days a week and do supplemental homeschooling the other three days.  We are lucky that the State of Texas does not require kindergarten and we will get another trial year before the decision seems real.  AC and I are still unsure about our long-term plans, but we may never be able to make a long-term decision with SC.  It may always be trial and error, see what will be best for her "now," and as much as I like to plan, I am okay with that.

*For anyone else who has a child who seems "ADHD" but also is displaying signs of giftedness, whether it is intellectual or talents, I would highly suggest reading the book Misdiagnosis and Dual Diagnoses of Gifted Children and Adults by James T. Webb, Ph.D., et al., as well as checking out SENG (Supporting the Emotional Needs of the Gifted), which also has quite a few resources specifically about the ADHD vs. gifted child dilemma. 

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"The more you read, the more things you will know."

Before we officially start school (which we do not have an official date for, but will probably coincide with the beginning of September) I have set myself a task to learn about some of the various styles of schooling and homeschooling.  I thought I had a good grasp on the differences between classical, Charlotte Mason, Montessori and interest-led/unschooling, but after making a comment to my friend J. about why I thought I only agreed with some of the classical ideas, he told me that I really needed to actually read some of the works written about classical schooling.  He gave me a short list of essays and a book, which he specifically recommended as concise and clear about classical education, and to it I have added a book or two about each of the other styles, to get a good grasp on each.  Then, hopefully, I will fully understand my own ideas and be able to apply the information I learn that I feel applies to SC to our homeschool this year.  Here is the list of books I will be reading over the next few weeks, though most likely not in this order.

"The Lost Tools of Learning" by Dorothy Sayers

"The Great Conversation" by Robert Hutchins (I think this is the whole of the book-length essay he wrote)

The Paideia Proposal: an educational manifesto by Mortimer Adler

The Well-Trained Mind: a guide to classical education at home by Susan Wise Bauer

The Well-Educated Mind: a guide to the classical education you never had by Susan Wise Bauer

A Charlotte Mason Education: a home schooling how-to manual by Catherine Levison

The Montessori Method: the origins of an educational innovation, including ... by Maria Montessori

Montessori Today: a comprehensive approach to education from birth to adulthood by Paula Lillard


Because we only have one child, we don't really know what is "normal" until someone points out what SC is doing is not.  Also, both AC and I are advanced (though, interestingly enough, he is math/science/technology and I am more rhetoric/language), so what seemed normal to us apparently isn't normal to everyone else.  However, it wasn't until SC started desiring knowledge and learning that we really thought about what it means for her to be advanced, and specifically, what it means for SC's learning (both from us and from any potential teachers she might have in the future).  After reading an article from Childhood Inspired about parenting a gifted child, plus hearing some of the same things going through my head voiced on the accelerated learner forums at The Well-Trained Mind Forums, I have decided to add these books as well.  Being advanced myself has in no way helped me understand my gifted child, whom I suspect is actually far past both myself and AC, and I need to hear what others have to say to give me ideas on how to provide her the best experience in both school and just life.

Genius Denied: how to stop wasting our brightest young minds by Jan & Bob Davidson

The Survival Guide for Parents of Gifted Kids by Sally Walker

A Parent's Guide to Gifted Children by James Webb

Gifted Children: myths and realities by Ellen Winner


If anyone has any suggestions, advice or opinions about anything I have posted here, please comment!


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