"Most people would walk along a path beside the river."

"Imagine you have to go along an Alpine river valley,” she said. “Most people would walk along a path beside the river. Not Leo. He’ll run up the first mountain and give you the view from there – and maybe across into the next valley, too. Then he’ll run down and up a mountain on the opposite side.  In no time, he’ll be exhausted – maybe he won’t reach the end.
But his journey will have been a damn sight more interesting than yours.
And he’ll know a lot more about that valley."
-Martin Buckley, 2013

A couple of days ago I read an article by a father named Martin Buckley called 
"My child is a genius – and it isn’t always easy."  I felt like I was reading an article I could have written about SC.  The resemblance to both Leo, and the parenting styles of Buckley, were uncanny to SC and I.  It has motivated me to write the post, which I have been holding back from, because maybe there is someone who will read it and feel comforted that they aren't alone, in the same way I was comforted by knowing Buckley and Leo exist.

First of all, I should point out that I personally don't like any of the terms that are used to describe gifted children because they are all alienating.  No matter which term you use, as a parent, as soon as you say "my child is gifted," you are also telling the world "my child is different," and no parent wants to have a child who might face challenges because of this.

Well, my child is gifted.  

For those who want the hard facts, we recently had SC tested (as we are starting kindergarten and wanted to know just where she was at so we can make the best educational decisions for her going forward) using the WPPSI-III and the WIAT-II.  The results came with a note from the examiner that SC's "inability to attend" made the results much lower than they should be, as did the fact that she refused to answer the "easy" questions (but did answer the more difficult ones).  This showed mostly on the WPPSI-III.  Without going into too much detail, on the WIAT-II, SC scored in the 99.8th percentile for Word Reading, and the 99.7th percentile for Math Reasoning.  Her age equivalents for these subtests are 6.8 years and 7 years, respectively.  She just turned 5.

In the article, Buckley wrote

"By the time Leo was four, it was sometimes hard to tell if he was wildly creative, or merely wild – unbounded, or lacking boundaries. "

Again, I felt like he was writing about us.  Having just lived through SC's fourth year, I would describe our frustration in this exact way.  Is she wildly creative, seeing the world through a different lens, or is she just wild?  Is she always questioning and asking why because her brain needs to understand, or is she just obstinate and defiant?  Buckley expounds that their experiences with Leo went similarly to our own daily experiences with SC. 

"Having it explained to him that he needed to sit in a given place, eat a given meal, follow a given routine, he would invariably ask, “Why?” And, often, he’d refuse. ...I learnt that a way to gain his cooperation was to weave a narrative around an action that made him want to become involved. And then his focus, his intensity of commitment, were remarkable and rewarding. But still exhausting."

AC laughs at my overly-detailed explanations of why SC should or should not do something, and how I give her very specific, truthful explanations to every question, but it is my only weapon against her mind deciding whether she should or should not.  She takes it all in, mulls it around, and then decides on her own.  One prominent example of this would be when SC was almost 4 years old, and we were struggling to get her to instinctively hold our hands when we crossed streets, the parking lot, etc.  She would just refuse, or pull away when we were walking.  She had decided she was big enough to walk on her own.  No matter how many times we explained how dangerous it could be, it wasn't until she saw on the local news a story about a young girl getting hit by a car in a parking lot that she decided to start holding hands, with no further pleading on my part needed.  She was able to see exactly what could happen if she went on her own, mulled it around in her head, and still actively grabs my hand now when we are walking near cars.  It isn't that she is afraid, either.  She has almost no fear of anything.  She just decided that being safe was a good choice for her in this situation.

Though AC goes along with my parenting style for SC, there have been times where outsiders (both extended family, as well as friends) have questioned us and the way we are doing things.  We have been told that we allow SC too much freedom, and it has been implied we are too lax in our discipline, regardless of the fact that every "suggestion" intended to guide her back toward compliance had been tried already and failed to bring about the result desired by these naysayers.  Buckley comments on the judgements of others, saying

"It was easy to feel isolated, because many parents and teachers judged that Leo had little parental formation, was allowed carte blanche.  The opposite was true. We worked daily, nightly, to impose routines. But Leo was reluctant to go along with anything just because he was asked to."

We do feel isolated most of the time; I, especially, since AC travels so much for work.  It is hard to find friends for me who understand I am doing the best I can with this bundle of energy and excitement God gave me, and it is hard to find friends for SC who are on her level intellectually.  She doesn't understand why her age-peers do many of the things they do, and when she tries to mimic them (to fit in), she overdoes it.  We have yet to find her intellectual peers, though she does well playing with the boys in the neighborhood who are a year or so older than she is.  However, we really don't get to see them that often.  Choosing to homeschool has isolated us even more, but at the moment that is the best choice for SC and where she is now.  She needs to be taught on the level she is at academically, and constantly stimulated intellectually, and in a public kindergarten, she probably won't get enough of that.  She is also in constant motion, and while at home she can do math in motion on the whiteboard, or lay on the floor to do reading, that is another thing that, if allowed in public kindergarten (and many or most students start acting this way), would cause utter chaos for the teacher in the classroom.

Many of the behaviors that SC exhibits that make her difficult to parent can be explained by a series of "overexcitabilities" that are common among gifted children.  A Polish psychiatrist named Kasimierz Dabrowski, who has specifically studied the intensity, excessive personalities and sensitivities of gifted children and adults, has grouped them together in his work, classifying them for the purpose of understanding.  If you want a good list of resources about Dabrowski's overexcitabilities, check out this page on the Hoagies' Gifted website.  However, I will list the classifications in brief, as summarized from the book Misdiagnosis and Dual Diagnoses of Gifted Children and Adults [MDDGCA], and how they relate to SC here.  

• The first overexcitability is "intellectual," which encompasses the excessive curiosity, question asking, theoretical thinking and problem solving.  This is a desire to simply gain knowledge, and the search of truth and understanding.  In SC, this is most obvious in her constant "why."  She doesn't only question when she is given instructions, she questions everything.
• The second overexcitability is "imaginational," which describes the complex imaginations, including pretend friends and their pretend worlds, but also the flair for the dramatic, daydreaming, and other visual creativities.  SC is less imaginative (though is very artistically creative), but she does have a fair amount of drama when she feels she needs to.
• The third overexcitability is "emotional," which is where extreme emotions and feelings are grouped.  Children and adults with this overexcitability tend to over-sympathize with the problems of the world around them, and become very attached to people, places and things.  They are frequently accused of overreacting, and in children, they may continue to have tantrums past the age of three and get excessively angry over minor issues.  This is an overexcitability I understand, as it is one that I have as well, but that doesn't make it easier when SC starts stomping her feet or throwing her body around.  She even hit the wall the other day when sent to timeout.  However, she also is hugely compassionate, and even someone who seems upset will send her into a fit of sympathetic tears.
• The fourth overexcitability is "psychomotor," which can be described as those who "love movement for its own sake, and they show a surplus of energy" (Webb, pg. 14).  This classification has SC written all over it, because one thing she doesn't do is stop moving.  Even in the car, strapped in, she is tapping her feet or doing something with her hands.  While some people who have this overexcitability may demonstrate it with a constant stream of chatter, SC simply is always in motion.  No matter how many physical activities we do in a day, she never tires out and is always ready for more.  Even when she was very small, she was on the go.
• The fifth overexcitability is "sensual," which details the aspects of life that a body's senses handle (sight, smell, touch, hearing, taste) and these are children and adults are overly sensitive to many of them.  For example, things like tags in clothing or lines on socks, an aversion to food textures, a dislike of noise in the background, or even strong smells literally overwhelm them.  This is one area that SC does not seem to have the noticeable overexcitability, but I tend to think it might be the opposite.  She can become excessive in her touch with people.  With other children, hugging turns into tackling, playing tag into shoving, and someone usually ends up hurt or upset.  With AC and I, we quickly become the jungle gym to be climbed upon when seated, and even if we are just standing together in line she might smack my body or or bump me roughly. 

Eventually we may have further testing done with SC, as was recommended by the examiner, that may help us narrow down these overexcitabilities and help us figure out if there are any underlying learning differences.  However, we will probably wait a few years to see what she simply "matures" out of and what doesn't, as well as any learning problems we stumble upon while schooling.

The most important thing out of all this is that I don't want to change SC and the person God created her to be.  She is intensely inquisitive.  She likes to have fun, and loves really good music, animals and showing those she loves that she loves them.  She gets upset when others are upset, and tells jokes that make sense to no one else, and laughs hysterically.  She picks up on things she shouldn't understand, and makes the most adult comments about them, like the time she told me how to get rid of lice (which she heard about on NPR).  She likes to quote movies and books, and sometimes at the wrong times, but always with relevance.  I don't want to produce another sheep for the factory floor, conforming to the current demands of demands of our American society.  I know God means for her to be more than just a follower of men.  He gave her this mind and spirit for His reasons, and who am I to break that for the whims of social acceptance?  I do want her to understand that there are rules that she has to follow, and that there will be consequences in she breaks them.  However, many of the rules imposed in the early years of childhood are done so for the purpose of learning a "lesson" that can be applied later in life.  There are minimal natural consequences for leaving your toys on the floor, and if the consequence is those toys going in the trash/donation and the child is okay with that, who comes out ahead as the winner?  What lesson has then been imparted that can be applied to later?  So, I trust that in time, as things come up that must be adhered to, God will show SC the "why," either through me or another outlet.  For now, I am okay that SC asks "why" after every instruction, because for her, she needs to really know, to understand (just like in the example with holding hands).  And, even if it is difficult and exhausting raising a gifted child, I trust God that He will give me what I need to support SC in becoming the best version of her that she can be.  As James Webb puts it (pg. 81), "as parents, our task is to discover who our child is and to help the child find his own profession."  That should be the goal of every parent.

In the future, I am going to try to be a bit more vocal about SC's giftedness when I write, because I think it is important for others in the same situation to know they are not alone.  Also, if you have a gifted child and are struggling (or not), I would love to hear from you (either through the comments or privately contact me through email at proverbs2pursuit@gmail.com) because it is hard to be on an island.

Cited:
Webb, James T., et. al. (2005). Misdiagnosis and Dual Diagnoses of Gifted Children and Adults. Scottsdale, AZ: Great Potential Press, Inc.

"As parents, our task is ..."

"As parents, our task is to discover who our child is 

and help the child find his own profession."

pg. 81, Misdiagnosis and Dual Diagnosis of Gifted Children and Adults, 

James T. Webb, et al

Admitting your child might be different, be it learning disabled or gifted, is difficult.  With programs like "No Child Left Behind," however, it has become much more acceptable to have a learning disabled child, and those who are intellectually or creatively gifted are seen as "weird" or "freaks."  Oftentimes parents are blamed for making their children the way they are by allowing them access to knowledge and learning at a young age.  A parent can no more make their child gifted by beginning to teach them at an early age than another parent can make their child disabled by not teaching them young.  In fact, it may be hard to believe, but most parents do not wish any differences upon their children at all, because our society sees differences of any kind (other than talent in sports) as a disadvantage.  There may be pressure, on both the child and the parents, to make the child conform to what society sees as "normal," be it through discipline, therapy or medication.  Webb, et al. states that "the attempt to give gifted children a 'normal' life and a 'normal' upbringing is like trying to make a giraffe act more like a horse -- an experience that is painful for all involved" (pg. 64).  Yet it is these differences, an integral part of who your child is, that may make up some of the more unique aspects of his or her personality.  If your child is not different in the same way that mine is, no offense is meant if/when I make generalizations or comments about groups of children.  If you have a child who is different from "normal," however he or she may be different, know that there are others out there who understand.  I hope my speaking out about the struggles we have parenting SC gives you confidence to do the same.

After one horrific piano lesson in early December 2012, I called SC's pediatrician in tears and made an appointment for an "11:30 consultation."  SC had just spent the entire lesson rolling around on the floor under the piano, jumping unrhythmically on purpose off the beats, answering questions about letters incorrectly (also on purpose), and just generally refusing to follow any of the teacher's instructions.  It may seem that she was just acting like a typical four-year-old, but the problem was she was capable of playing the piece the teacher had asked her to play.  In fact, when she finally played it (for the first time ever, after seeing the teacher play it only once, at the end of the lesson), she played it perfectly, with no mistakes.  

See, we had just moved her to private lessons, at the request of her former teacher, due to her impatience at waiting for the other children in her group lesson to catch up.  She caught on to everything her teacher had been doing so quickly, she was bored while the other kids tried to learn, and her previous teacher thought it might be a good idea if the entire lesson was focused on her.  In fact, this was a pattern that was becoming all too apparent, with piano lessons being the latest request to move SC from group lessons to private, because she understood things very quickly, and then would become bored (and inattentive, disobedient, destructive, out-of-control) while she waited for the other kids to "catch up" to where she was.

So, we made this appointment with her pediatrician, and he asked a series of questions.  We tried to give our observations, but it is hard to fit four and a half years of life with SC into a thirty minute consultation.  He said she sounded bright, but he also said he thought she had ADHD.  He then gave us  a checklist to fill out and one for each of her teachers, as well as a pamphlet about ADHD, and he said that the AAP recommends both occupational therapy/intervention plans as well as medication, and that doing both showed the best results with many patients.  

After making a follow-up for one month hence, we left the appointment dumbstruck.  ADHD was something that we had heard about, but we were not expecting him to say was SC's problem.  In fact, what we were hoping was that he would say she is not that different from all other kids her age, and maybe she is just more easily bored than others, and here is the solution to this problem.  In fact, I know I was looking for a magic answer.  A book of twelve steps to follow or a list of if...then statements that we matched up to her behaviors that made her more manageable   Instead, we left with the idea that our child might need to be medicated for the rest of her life in order to "fit in" to the acceptable social norms.  Now, I am not against all medication, and I believe that there are truly children that need to be on medication for their differences, but I also believe that parents should not swap one set of problems (the ADHD-like symptoms) for another set of problems (the side effects) that just so happen to be socially acceptable just because things are hard.  So, I did what I always do when I am faced with a problem - I started reading.

In August, I listed some books that I wanted to read as we attempt to decide which path would be the best educational path for SC, some of them about gifted children because it had been mentioned to us that SC seems to do things developmentally quicker than other children.  I thought it would be a good idea to include them, to see if they had any hints that might make our decision easier.  While  I have read some of these books in part, life tends to get in the way of our plans, and I have yet to completely finish any but the first two on the list, which are really long essays rather than books.  

However, as I attempted these past weeks to get back on track to learning about SC, I found a book called Misdiagnosis and Dual Diagnoses of Gifted Children and Adults by the author of of one of the gifted books already on my list.  This caught my eye because I had just spent over an hour with SC's preschool teacher, discussing her behavior in class, and that her teacher feels she does not have ADHD (she has been trained to recognize it, as well as gifted students through her teaching degree program and years in the public school system) but that she is even more highly advanced/gifted than we all initially thought.  She said that she believes the behavior problems are a combination of boredom and SC's emotional development still being at four years old, right where her peers are.

The authors of Misdiagnosis suggest that "as many as half of gifted children with the diagnosis of ADD/ADHD do not have the significant impairments due to attention or hyperactivity that are required ... to make an ADD/ADHD diagnosis" (pg. 37).  The problem is that many of the characteristics of children with ADHD actually can also be seen in gifted children, but the difference in the symptoms is only evident when someone asks the question "why" - why are they behaving the way they are.  For example, both a child with ADHD and a gifted child may not follow directions well, but a child with ADHD actually has trouble following them (and all rules/directions), while a gifted child is choosing not to follow certain ones after questioning their legitimacy.  Both children with ADHD and gifted children may seem unable to concentrate on tasks, but a child with ADHD has trouble focusing on all tasks that do not have immediate consequences, while a gifted child chooses not to focus on tasks they deem irrelevant or uninteresting.  It is very important to ask why a child is doing (or not doing) they thing that is causing the problem.  With SC, we already knew that the why of the behaviors was a convoluted explanation and a conscious choice on her part.  However, Misdiagnosis (and the resources I found at SENG) has opened up the possibility that this is because she is gifted rather than something needs to be "fixed."  Apparently, this is normal (for her).  

One of the solutions that the book offers to behavior problems is that "changing the environment can effectively treat many conditions" (pg. xxxiii).  The theory is that "many of these disorders [as diagnosed in gifted children] are the result of the interaction between temperament and environment" (pg. xxxiii), which is very much what SC's preschool teacher suggested.  In the preschool classroom, she has started pulling SC out for higher level work, like beginning addition, more advanced reading/phonics work.  She suggested that when we are working on homeschooling, that instead of seeing SC's desire to turn her handwriting letters into aliens or bugs as not following directions, to view them as her being creative because she is bored.  So, we cut down the handwriting to a more manageable "if you do this one line well, you can skip the next two," and it has really worked.  I get a focused, well written line of letters and she moves through it without feeling overwhelmed and bored.  We got a timer that we set for twenty minutes (that she loves to set and look at) before we start each new activity, and that has motivated her to work quickly.  If she isn't done by that time, we move on to something else and either come back to the first activity or, if her work so far was exceptional and it was clear she was bored, we don't.  We replaced her chair with an exercise ball that has kept her from bouncing all over the place (pun intended) as she tried to work on activities that require writing, be it phonics, math or handwriting.  

We have also headed in a more "unschooling" direction that is SC focused and led by her interests because, at the moment, we can do that.  She is still only four and a half years old, and she deserves play time.  I completely cut out science and French (other than videos or iPad games) and we will just wait until next year, and I am okay with that.  We took a trip to see mummies even though it cut out half of a week.  Some days we only do math, and some days we do everything.  Some days she wants to do art four times and that is okay, because then when we do get to things like phonics or handwriting, she is more interested in it and it does not feel like I am forcing her into it.

Misdiagnosis has opened up my eyes to the idea that SC is in the profoundly gifted category of children, and while that is nice to hear, it is also quite scary.  I like to joke that she is smarter than both AC and I, but it looks like it is true.  So the question becomes, what now?  Well, we went back to our pediatrician, armed with copies of resources, documentation from her preschool teacher, and ready to hear the worst - that we were "wishing" our child was gifted, but that he still felt we should try to put her on medication "just to see."  In reality, he diligently listened to our information, agreed that it is possible she fits into the profoundly gifted category of students, though she may have ADHD too.  However, his response this time was that "time will tell," and I am okay with that.  Through this brief, yet intense process, I have learned that time is the only thing that will give me an answer.  We will have to see if SC's emotional maturity levels out, or if she continues to struggle.  We talked about having her IQ tested, but he said at this point, it would just be for our own, personal reference, and to wait to spend the money if we need it for a school in the future.  Right now, we are comfortable with our decision for next year, to continue with the Mothers' Day Out's kindergarten program two days a week and do supplemental homeschooling the other three days.  We are lucky that the State of Texas does not require kindergarten and we will get another trial year before the decision seems real.  AC and I are still unsure about our long-term plans, but we may never be able to make a long-term decision with SC.  It may always be trial and error, see what will be best for her "now," and as much as I like to plan, I am okay with that.

*For anyone else who has a child who seems "ADHD" but also is displaying signs of giftedness, whether it is intellectual or talents, I would highly suggest reading the book Misdiagnosis and Dual Diagnoses of Gifted Children and Adults by James T. Webb, Ph.D., et al., as well as checking out SENG (Supporting the Emotional Needs of the Gifted), which also has quite a few resources specifically about the ADHD vs. gifted child dilemma. 

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Thankful Thursday: "I like to listen."

“I like to listen. 

I have learned a great deal from listening carefully. 

Most people never listen.”

-Ernest Hemingway

This week I am thankful to the creators of audiobooks, as well as those wonderful people who narrate them.  While on our trip last weekend to Seattle/Tacoma and Portland (more on that later), I had the opportunity to listen to The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien.  I was excited to be listening to it, but to be honest, I was also a bit leery.  

My previous experience with audiobooks was listening to both Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass on a trip to Nevada before I saw the latest movie.  I really had a hard time paying attention to the story, and every time AC or I wanted to say something I obsessively stopped the recording so I wouldn't miss anything.  I got through both stories with an understanding of the plot, but really didn't "get into" the books in any way.

I expected my experience with The Hobbit to be similar, but really wanted to give it a shot. SC would only request the same five bands over and over on the trip (which I love, but we listen to them daily already), and I wanted to try something different.  

However, I was more than just pleasantly surprised, but absolutely blown away by Rob Inglis' narration of The Hobbit.  He uses different voices for each character.  He SINGS all the songs that Tolkien wrote into the story.  I am so enamored with the story and Inglis' telling of it that not only did I listen on the trip down to Portland and back, but I gave AC a quick recap of the first seven chapters and forced him to listen along with me when we decided to take an impromptu drive to Ocean Shores, WA to see the sunset (see picture below), and I sat in the bathtub last night until the water was cold just to finish the eleven-hour tale.

I found it curious, however, that I could be so completely taken by this one audiobook, and so completely turned off by the others.  AC explained it to me, though.  Rob Inglis read the story in a way that I am not capable, and it was an altogether different experience for me.  See, I do not do voices, or SONGS, and really struggle to stick with stories I read myself that have a long list of characters.  I can do action, adventure and excitement, but I prefer a book with only one or two main characters that (in my head) talk just like me.  AC is the opposite, and I love that when he reads to SC at night each character has a different voice, and I am pleased that she has picked up that art as I hear her playing or telling stories.  So I was really able to "get into" this story because the narrator made it an experience for me, while whichever version of the Alice tales did not go that far, which forced me to listen as I would have read, rather than just listen.

I have decided that if being read aloud to is good for SC, it must be good for me, so I am going to try to find audiobook versions of all the books that I have previously struggled with, started and stopped, and hope that the narrators have what it takes to capture me.  This list includes the remaining Lord of the Rings trilogy books, which I have found narrated by Rob Inglis, as well as The Count of Monte Cristo, War and Peace, Anna Karenina, Jane Eyre, and maybe some James Joyce (but can anyone really make Joyce make sense?).

What audiobooks are you thankful for and would recommend?  Leave a comment, then check out:

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Top Ten Tuesday: "The meeting of two personalities ..."

"The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed." - Carl Jung

Last week I read a guest post by Tara Ziegmont on The Pelsers' blog about getting to know your homeschool student.  Specifically, it asked the question "do you know your [child's] learning style?"  I, unfortunately, had to respond in the negative.  These past few months of pseudo-homeschooling while we just live life I have not taken any steps to learn what learning styles even are, nor how to focus what SC's are into a better educational experience for her.  

Since this year I really want to take a serious look at whether or not homeschooling is the best choice for our family, at least for the near future, I spent some time reading up about Myers-Briggs typology, analyzing myself, analyzing SC (analyzing AC, of course, too), and trying to use this new knowledge to apply it back toward my teaching plans for this year.




This week, for the "Top Ten Tuesday" linkup, I have decided to apply my new knowledge and understanding, and create a list of the top ten challenges I will face this year with SC.  First, however, I must state that after analysis of us both, I have a Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) INTP, while SC has a MBTI of ISTP.  Though these are quite similar, there are a few differences between us that will make for some big challenges for me as a teacher, as I attempt to adapt to SC.

1.  Theoretical vs. factual:  My inclination to indulge in intellectual exploration and theoretical avenues are at cross purposes to SC's desire for solid facts and evidence.  I think this will manifest itself in almost every area, which is why I think it will be the biggest challenge I will face.  It will require me to literally remove myself from the way I think about everything and attempt to see it how SC might perceive it.

2.  Kinesthetic vs. reading/writing:  This challenge is almost as difficult as number 1, because this is another major area where INTP and ISTP personalities differ.  SC will need as much kinesthetic/hands-on activity in each subject area as I can create, but since I am a reading/writing focused learner, I am going to have to do more research and utilize the ideas of others to make this happen.  Luckily, this is one area that I had already observed, so our curriculum plans include programs that have quite a bit of hands-on activities that directly accompany the subjects.

3.  Journey vs. goal:  For an INTP like me, the most important part of learning is the journey.  It does not bother me if I never get to solving the problem as long as the journey is enjoyable.  However, for an ISTP like SC, the most important part is the solution.  This will be a challenge for me to remember not to think only of the journey, but to know there needs to be a concrete and practical outcome that SC needs to reach with each lesson.

4.  Self-interests:  ISTP personalities typically struggle in most school settings because they can be single-minded, only focusing on what interests them.  My challenge here will be to make new subjects and lessons interesting to her.  However, this blends into challenge number 5.

5.  Teacher as obstruction:  When ISTP personalities are presented with information that is not part of their current interest area, they will go around or ignore the teacher completely in order to get to the information they want.  This will be a challenge to both motivate her within her interests, but keep her learning in other areas as well.

6.  Time regulation:  SC already wants to do things when she wants, where she wants, with her own goals in mind.  My challenge will be to help her regulate her learning into realistic day-to-day activities, so that she progresses well in all subject areas.  I also will have the challenge of really getting on a schedule that is manageable for us, as I tend to allow interruptions that do not really need to happen.  I hope to print out an easy-to read graphic schedule for SC so that she can also keep track of what we are doing when. 

7.  Complexity: ISTP personalities learn best when the subjects they are learning are technically complex.  This predisposes them for STEM subjects.  While I have a solid understanding of certain STEM areas, I would not call my knowledge base complex by any means.  The challenge here, though probably not immediately at a K4/1st level, will be to push SC forward in these areas even as she leaves me behind.  At some point, I will have to rely on her self-interest and desire to increase her practical knowledge to guide her toward what she needs to be learning in those areas.

8.  Social issues:  The "I" from ISTP stands for "introvert," which is definitely a characteristic that SC and I both share.  For both of us the challenge here will be to make sure we are making the most of social times, including in our out of the house activities (her dance classes, gymnastics and piano lessons), as well as meeting up with other homeschooling families that live in the area.

9. More social issues:  Though ISTP personalities are introverted, they connect best with people when they are involved in kinesthetic activities together rather than simply a dialogue-based relationship.  At SC's young age, however, she has a hard time understanding personal space, that pushing and shoving are not acceptable, and that she can hurt people.  

10. Have fun!:  Maybe this one should have been at the top.  In everything we do, I need to remember that SC is only four years old, and that she needs even her learning time to be enjoyable.

Any comments, advice or opinions are welcomed.  Don't forget to check out other "Top Ten Tuesday" posts here.

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